All relationships have peaks and valleys, good times and not-so-great ones. In fact, the fantasy of love at first sight, knowing you’ve met your soul mate with never a doubt or conflict along the way may not signal a perfect relationship. Social psychologist and professor at University of Toronto’s Rotman School of Management, Dr. Spike W.S. Lee says, “Our findings corroborate prior research showing that people who implicitly think of relationships as perfect unity between soul mates have worse relationships than people who implicitly think of relationships as a journey of growing and working things out.”

Knowing that love is a journey and expecting ups and downs, how do you spot bad relationships? There are limits to what the bad times should entail in a healthy relationship. If the ups are starting to feel like anthills and the downs like bottomless pits, it could be time to think about being single for a while. To help you assess your own, here are 15 surefire signs you’re in an unhealthy relationship.

1. You realize youre becoming someone you dont recognize.
Bad relationships cause anxiety. Normal, healthy relationships inspire both individuals to grow and change. However, if you feel like you’re losing yourself, it’s time to take a step back and think about where you’re headed.

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