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But like most issues in life, it gets more complicated and murky with specifics. At dinner with my girlfriends, the discussion became animated when the subject of bullying came up. One friend’s son was being bullied by another boy—a so-called “frenemy”—the worst kind because they were friends and now the bully was her son’s enemy for some unknown reason. My friend thought it might go away. It got worse. Her husband recommended their boy just belt the bully and stand up for himself. Diligent and smart, my friend looked up the California Education Code and discovered that the Zero Tolerance approach that schools take to violence could result in the suspension of all parties regardless of circumstances. She alerted the principal, the teacher and let them know about the bullying. Nothing was done.