For starters, you need to all agree that what happened in the past, stays in the past. Kids fight, they bully each other and they make mistakes. Don’t let that time your brother shoved you into a pile of mud or that time your sister embarrassed you at a birthday party ruin the relationship you could have now. Yes, you had conflicts when you were kids, but now that you are adults, you need to be able to forgive those past confrontations and emotions so you can move forward to a mutually loving and respectful relationship. As Jeff Kluger, author of The Sibling Effect: What the Bonds Among Brothers and Sisters Reveal About Us, argues, “siblings who battled a lot as kids may become closer as adults–and more emotionally skilled too, often clearly recalling what their long-ago fights were about and the lessons they took from them.”