Helicopters hover overhead like metal vultures. News channels run the same looped footage for hours. A lorry is tilted at a very dramatic angle. It looks like a modern art installation. Abstract expressionism, car-crash style.
Social media explodes. People post photos from their dashcams. “Look at this queue!” they whine. It’s a competition for who is suffering the most. The winner gets zero prizes except the satisfaction of being late for work.
Some clever person will start a hashtag. #M25Madness or #OrbitalOops. It trends for exactly twenty minutes before being replaced by a cute cat video. That’s just how the internet works.
M25 closed in Essex after anticlockwise multi-vehicle crash - BBC News
The Silver Lining
Here’s a quirky fact: these massive traffic jams are great for local businesses. The petrol station at the exit sells ten times its usual amount of overpriced sandwiches. The pub in the nearby village gets a sudden rush of stressed-out drivers. “Pint of lager, please. I’ve been trapped for three hours.”
You also get to learn patience. You can’t get angry forever. Eventually, you just accept your fate. You listen to a podcast. You clean out your glovebox. You find a receipt from 2019 and wonder what you bought. Introspection at 65 miles per hour (stationary).
