It was easy to make friends when we were in college. A classmate living down the hall could easily become a comadre and confidant. We made time for our friends then because we were less busy. Then we graduated and everything changed. We were working women and/or graduate students. We relocated. We return to our hometowns for holidays, but everyone and everything seems foreign now. We’ve lost touch with friends, and ultimately, are more focused on our careers, our romantic relationships, our husbands, our kids. All of a sudden, you and your spouse find you have very few friends, and find that as often as not, it’s you, him and the kids on a Saturday night.
If this sounds like you, all hope is not lost! You can make friends once your cosmo-drinking, single-gal days have passed. You can even find great couples friends with whom to socialize, with or without the kids. Here are some tips on how couples can make friends with other couples.
JOIN GROUPS WITH COMMON INTERESTS
A few years ago my friends were all getting hitched. One by one they married and had babies and I was left without a hang-out buddy. Instead of wallowing in self pity, I went to Meetup and searched for groups that shared my common interests. I went to karaoke events and mixers for Latinos and met wonderful people who are still my friends today. The same can be done if you are a couple looking for other couples to befriend. Join a cooking class for couples. Go to mixers for couples. You can also join book clubs or any other group that caters to your interests as an individual. The trick is to be proactive, because you’re not meeting anyone sitting on your couch.
Read Related: Mommy Dating: How to Make Friends With Other Moms
FRIENDS OF FRIENDS
You may have a single friend who has a great friend who is in a relationship. You may also have a coworker who is married or a neighbor that has a cousin that you can connect with. Friends can be made everywhere and anywhere. You just have to be open! That means accepting invitations to baby showers, weddings, and BBQ’s. You never know where you will meet that special couple that is the ying to your yang.
AN ABUNDANCE OF FRIENDS
Not all romantic relationships are meant to last and neither are all friendships. Some friends are great for certain outings and activities but only for a certain period of time. So be flexible. Know that not every couple will meet your standards in every way. Your husband may think your friend’s husband is a dud but he may be okay with the dud while watching sports. The wife may not become your BFF but she sure is fun to shop with. That’s why having an abundance of friends is necessary. Not only do you have variety but you also have a choice about with whom to spend your time.