No relationship is perfect, but there are definitely some things that should never be tolerated. Having standards for what you will and will not tolerate in a relationship doesn’t mean you are self-centered, it means you respect yourself and your partner enough to know what belongs in a healthy relationship and what does not.

When you’re in love, it’s easy to overlook or ignore warning signs of certain behaviors and personality traits that can actually harm us emotionally and even physically. “When we start to feel that something is off, we have to trust our instincts that something is just not okay,” explains psychotherapist and author, Beatty Cohen.

Of course, no one is perfect, but you should never have to put up with any sort of behavior that makes you feel small, unimportant, or even fearful of your partner. Read on to find out about 12 unacceptable behaviors that should never go unchecked.