1. They’re Evolutionary
    Most primates’ mammary glands only swell when they’re lactating. Human breast tissue grows and stays large (though larger when nursing, right girls?) throughout our lives. Why? Theories suggest that over thousands of years, in order to facilitate mating and procreation of the species, men appreciated being able to identify a women’s shape from a distance. Basically, we were kind of like prey and boobs made us easier to find among a sea of men without them. Lovely.