Right now, their tour schedule looks like a map of North America with a few stray pins in Asia. London is a ghost town on that list. It’s the same feeling you get when your favourite takeaway closes for a week – a quiet, personal tragedy.
I’ve been refreshing social media like it’s my job. My thumb is getting a workout that would make an Olympic athlete jealous. Every time the group posts a photo, I squint at the background, looking for a red telephone box or a Greggs sign.
It’s a bit like trying to spot a unicorn in your local Sainsbury’s. You know it’s possible, but you also accept you might be waiting for a very long time.
The Unofficial Expert Opinion
I asked my friend Dave, who calls himself a “pop culture analyst” (he has a Spotify account and a strong opinion). Dave reckons they’re waiting for the right moment. “The UK,” he said, munching a crisp, “is a mood. You can’t just show up in January. Your energy will get absorbed by the fog.”
He might be onto something. We British fans are a loyal bunch. We will stand in the rain for hours, but we expect a bit of ceremony. If Katseye announces a show at a venue like the O2 Brixton, we’ll treat it like a national holiday.
Until that day, we are left with the classic tactic: manifesting. I’ve started leaving my umbrella at home to lure them out. It’s a sacrifice, but I’m willing to get wet for good music.
