Let’s address the elephant in the room: Alan’s body. It’s ridiculous. He’s like if a Viking and a bouncer had a baby. But Catherine is famously unimpressed by his muscles. She once said in an interview that “he looks like a giant toddler when he sleeps.” Imagine waking up to a co-sleeping toddler who can bench 300 pounds. She’s a hero.
Alan Ritchson and Catherine: An Enduring Love Story That Began with an
Also, Alan has admitted he’s insanely clumsy. He falls over furniture. He walks into doors. He’s a bull in a china shop, but the china shop is his own home. Catherine just mops up the blood and hands him a Band-Aid. That’s the untold story: she’s the real action hero, managing a man who’s one wrong step away from demolishing their kitchen.
The Internet’s Favorite Unhinged Moment
Remember when Alan went viral for wearing a shirt that said “I’m a good husband”? It was a joke from his podcast, but the internet lost its mind. “He’s bragging?!” No, you fools—he was mocking the idea of needing a shirt to prove it. Catherine probably rolled her eyes and bought him a helmet for his next clumsy fall.
Who Is Alan Ritchson's Wife? Meet Catherine Ritchson
And get this: they have a shared calendar where they schedule “stupid fights.” Like, they set a timer for 10 minutes to argue about who left the milk out. Then they laugh and move on. That’s right, they scheduled their disagreements. It’s either the smartest marriage advice ever or the most exhausting. Either way, I’m taking notes.