A long, hot bath is your best friend. Add a cup of baking soda to the water. It’s a mild alkali that neutralizes the tan.
Sit there until your fingers prune. Read a trashy magazine. This isn’t science—it’s spa warfare.
Don’t forget to drain the tub afterwards. That brown ring is not your legacy.
The Shower Hack
Wet your skin. Apply a paste of baking soda and water. Let it dry for ten minutes. You’ll look like a ghost with ambitions.
Rinse it off in the shower. Use a loofah to gently buff. The tan will peel off in satisfying little sheets.
Pro tip: Do this at night. Your bathroom will look like a crime scene. Roommates will ask questions. Smile enigmatically.
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