The ban might be lifted across most of the county, but if you’re in one of the restricted zones and decide to play rebel, Thames Water can issue a £1,000 fine. That’s a LOT of trips to the pub you could be missing out on. So check your postcode before you turn on the tap. It’s not worth risking your holiday fund over a damp lawn.
Thames Water Announces Hosepipe Ban Across Oxfordshire Amid Record Dry
Also, peeing in the shower isn’t a loophole. I know, disappointing. But seriously, just use a bucket or a watering can. It’s meditative. You can pretend you’re a Roman emperor tending to your villa’s garden. Or a very mundane superhero.
The Great Hosepipe Mystery: Are Neighbours Spying on Each Other?
I’ve heard whispers that during the ban, some Oxfordshire residents turned into amateur sleuths, reporting neighbours for surreptitious garden watering. One person told me they spotted a man at 11 p.m. wearing a black hoodie and using a hose in the dark. That’s either a water thief or a very confused raccoon. Either way, don’t be that neighbour. We’re all in this dry boat together.
Instead of snitching, why not share your rainwater? Form a “hosepipe-free zone” support group on your street. You can drink tea, complain about the weather, and trade gardening tips. It’s like a book club, but with fewer arguments about plot twists.
