When I was about to give birth to my first child, I remember my OB walking into the delivery room, crossing her arms over her chest magnanimously and announcing, “Ok. I’m here. Now you can have this baby!” Then she stretched out her arms so the nurse could slip on her gown and tie the mask to her face like she was James Brown or something. All she needed was a nurse to dab her sweat. Meanwhile, I was lying there spread-eagled, my feet up in the stirrups with a baby practically dangling from my lady parts. Not the most dignified of positions.